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Please, Don't Touch Anything Review

Please, Don't Touch Anything Review

In games, it's generally expected of the player to touch, break, and steal anything they please – RPGs even let you enter strangers' houses without permission; even though, in the real world, doing so would leave you with a court date and a criminal record instead of a cool new item. Gamers can do nearly anything they want within the confines of a game, so you can imagine what little confidence might be inspired by a game titled Please, Don't Touch Anything.

Described as 'brain-wracking' by developer Four Quarters, Please Don't Touch Anything takes shape as a puzzle game where you look after a friend’s workstation while they go off to the bathroom. Their only instructions to you? “Please, don't touch anything.”. This sounds simple enough, but, of course, rules are made to be broken. The workstation appears sparse, with only a monitor of a city-scape on it, and a tantalisingly large red button crying out to be pushed. Doing so, as you can expect, will open Pandora's Box; a self-destruct switch appears over the city, and once it’s pulled, it's game over. So soon? Not as soon as you'd think.

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This is not the end of the game by any stretch. After the city explodes, you pull a reset switch, and you begin right back where you started. This is where it becomes apparent that there is more than one ending to the game, and there may be more than one way to play; however, how to do so is all up to you. The only thing left to help you is a cryptic sheet on 'instructions' posted on the wall, so your only option is to try every possible option available. “But what options?” I hear you cry. “There's only one button and a switch!”. This is the appeal of Please Don't Touch Anything: the game is left intentionally sparse to kickstart the part of your brain that says, “What if I try that?” — once you start to experiment, the game opens up, and your control panel reveals more buttons and more options which will lead to unlocking the different endings the game has to offer. This game doesn't hold your hand; it encourages you to think outside the box, which results in a deeply satisfying puzzle experience.

The real phenomenon of this game are the graphics. Part of the reason that the game will win you over; the graphics have been crafted in lovely mock 8-bit style coloured heavily with stark greys to demonstrate the gravity of the situation. The centrepiece of your control panel is an old monitor, coloured in black and green. This really helps relay the facts that the technology in front of you is really antiquated, so you have to be extra careful not to push buttons mindlessly. The graphical presentation in Please, Don't Touch Anything is spot-on because it matches the game being played perfectly; basic, yet desolate, and as a result, both the game and the graphics feel better together, as if in harmony.

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Not only does Please, Don't Touch Anything tick the right boxes visually and mechanically, it also sounds amazing. The game boasts a brilliantly tense soundtrack that favours minimal instrumentation to make your hairs stand on end as you navigate the workstation. This creates a nail-biting atmosphere that makes you feel like you're trying to decide whether to cut the red or the blue wire in an action movie. Ultimately, the soundtrack is stellar, and, much like the graphics, perfectly complements the game’s mood.

However, what may deter some players is that the game may feel too clever for its own good. The puzzles that the game tasks you to solve rely on experimentation and fragmented clues scattered through the work area. The early puzzles are dead easy to work out, but later on, the logic that the game uses may become harder and harder to follow; personally, I ended up having to use a guide to solve the later puzzles. Yet, the real joy of this game is coming up with ways to solve the puzzles; for example, pressing this button, then that button, then inputting this code - it will come off as frustrating, but once you finally get a solution, this game and its puzzles will make perfect sense. Just prepare yourself to feel a little stupid through the duration.

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As a side note, what is rather appealing about Please, Don't Touch Anything are its little nods to pop culture. To name a few; Space Invaders, Bender Bending Rodriguez, and the Illuminati show up, and these make for funny moments, but don't get this wrong: Please, Don't Touch Anything is really not a comedy game at heart. At its core, this game has a serious message in relation to humans and how, sometimes, temptations get the better of us. We were warned not to touch that button, but we went ahead and did it anyway. In truth, no sane human would leave the button alone in this game. Our curiosity drives us, and, although curiosity killed the cat, we keep journeying forward: why? Because we want to, orders and rules be damned.

Players usually relish the freedom they get in most games to do as they please without repercussions. That's why it's a breath of fresh air to have a game that subtly makes you think about the consequences of your actions. Even though you only witness the damage to the city through a dingy monochrome screen, it will likely cause an unsettling feeling of, “Oh, no, did I do that?”. I commend Four Quarters for blending this aspect into this game. Yes, at its core, this is only a simple one-screen puzzle game, but making us truly think about what we're doing separates it from the billion other puzzle games that flood the market, putting it in the same rarified air as – dare I say it? - the likes of Portal. Yes, Please Don't Touch Anything is really that good.

8.50/10 8½

Please, Don’t Touch Anything (Reviewed on Windows)

This game is great, with minimal or no negatives.

Only once in a blue moon do the stars align to bring us a game as well-crafted and meaningful as Please, Don't Touch Anything. Genuinely thoughtful, challenging, and beautiful; this may not look like a winner, and will definitely be the source of at least one puzzle-related headache, but give it the time of day, and it will grip you hard.

This game was supplied by the publisher or relevant PR company for the purposes of review
Ben McCurry

Ben McCurry

Mobile Writer

Writes about videogames. Hopelessly incompetent at making his own, he has settled for criticising others people's games instead

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COMMENTS

Acelister
Acelister - 10:46am, 11th April 2015

Nuts... I clicked the button to read this review... I'd be hopeless at this.

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yunus55
yunus55 - 12:26pm, 4th October 2015

play

Reply