The Bittersweet Feeling of Replaying Hollow Knight

It's been four years since I had my first encounter with Hallownest, as I fought arduous battles through numerous playthroughs in my relentless attempt at earning all of the punishing achievements. I fought through the Pantheon of Hallownest, and as I watched the "Embrace the Void" ending pass through my screen, satisfaction filled my gut with the knowledge that I'd had the pleasure of enjoying this masterpiece. The ending did not come without sorrow, however, as I knew that my journeys were over.

Four years have passed since then, and easily one of my favourite games of all time is enjoying its fifth anniversary; I figured there was no better way to commemorate such a masterpiece than re-experiencing it. For clarification, four years ago was not the last time I played Hollow Knight, although it was the last time I did so not only intending to get the savefile to 100%, but also overall since the last time I fought the Hollow Knight.

As I booted the game once again, I watched over the initial cutscene with glee. You see, almost every time I've launched the game and played, I've been terrified to my core. The first time, I played through Hollow Knight knowing that the game was hard; the second time, I was scared out of my bones knowing I had to finish it without a single death; and finally, the third time I started a new file, I did so knowing I would undertake the Pantheon of Hallownest. This time, however, I knew I booted the game with the sole purpose of enjoying my experience through it. There was no uncertain feeling in my gut telling me I would fail. No stress or tension when fighting the Hollow Knight as, even if I died, I knew I'd already been down this journey before. 

Hollow Knight has gorgeous graphics that still stand out to this day. These graphics are only so much more jaw-dropping when backed with my CX OLED display, which made the 'Ode to Hallownest' poem shine through the contrasting, black background.

I remembered nigh instantaneously why I loved the game so much the first time I'd experienced it, as the graphics and music worked synchronously to deliver a feeling of bliss. Everything sounded and looked as good as ever, and if you told me Hollow Knight was released yesterday, I'd have nought a doubt about it.

It came as a surprise to me that despite the years I'd spent away from Hallownest, I found myself performing tricks I'd picked up in my time training for the final challenge. I still found myself being untouched whenever traversing throughout the kingdom as if I was still a seasoned player that had stopped playing only yesterday. It was a bittersweet feeling; knowing that all of my hours of practice to conquer the pantheon had not been lost, yet — at the same time — each of the battles I fought with ease, knowing that I'd experienced and squeezed every ounce of new content that Hollow Knight had to offer me. 

This is not to say that I regret my time with the game, quite the contrary, as my feelings about my completion of the title are an oxymoron. I am pleased with the thought that I've had the absolute pleasure of playing through the entire journey, knowing that I am one of the players that had the satisfaction of fighting and completing the Pantheon of Hallownest. Yet, I am woeful at the thought that I may never experience that again. I'll sing with every battle theme as if it were something I'd played on repeat hundreds of times, for I have, with each of the bosses.

Having the pleasure of playing through Hollow Knight is a bittersweet feeling, for knowing that you are experiencing a true masterpiece in its genre should only bring joy, but once out the other side, as the credits roll, it teaches you the reasoning of why one of the most common questions asked to gamers is, "If you could play a game for the first time again, which one would it be?". Knowing this is both a blessing and a curse, one that Hollow Knight has afflicted me with.