Diary of an NPC - Entry Two

In every game you play the main character - the plot revolves around your every moment in the game like as unto a god. Of course, this means you ignore what's going on with the people around who you're controlling. The people who drive around, go in and out of stores and generally live their lives. But did you realise there are a limited number of so-called NPCs? To do their jobs in all of these games, especially the heavily-populated ones, they need to be able to come and go as they please. These people don’t think it’s odd to go from deep space to a land of dinosaurs in the space of a week - it’s their way of life. In this series, we follow one of these people - Nigel Philip Charles. After some misfortune, he left Los Santos for a higher, colder climate…

Dear Diary,

Well, the trip up was uneventful but I made it to Whiterun in sunny cold Skyrim! I got myself a sword and I rode a horse! That was cool. I got some furs too - real ones from a deer not like the ones aunt Karen had from minks. This is gonna be so cool!

Dear Diary,

Met some cool people at the tavern (that's what I used to call a bar!) shared some drinks and jokes. Man, I can't remember anyones name... It's all "Dave Son of this" and "Danny the Quick" - but with those old timey names like Yorick and junk... Why does nobody around here call their kid something normal like Nigel? Yorick the Quick - what does that even mean?

Dear Diary,

Got myself a job with the local shoppe today - Belethor's General Goods. So far nobody has tried to kill me in a gang-situation, frame me for drug trafficking or run me over. Sure there was a shoplifter, but I'm not getting in the middle of that and getting stabbed for calling the city watch. Bad enough there's been talk in the tavern about dragons being real and nearby...

Dear Diary,

So it turns out dragons have always been real. Apparently the local castle was built to hold a dragon, back during some war or something. Ask me, why would you want a dragon so close to the Jarl? Suppose that's why it's called Dragonsreach, though... Oh! I told this great joke at the tavern, I'd best write it down or I'll forget it. We were talking about some Dragonborn adventurer, so I said "I used to be an adventurer too, until I took an arrow to the knee!" Pretty funny, eh Diary?

Dear Diary,

Had to leave town to go on a supply run for Belethor's General Goods today. Just to one of the nearby villages to get some veggies to sell to the market vendors. Met a cute girl called Nimriel there, but I think the farm owner is using her for more than her farming skills... Yeah, she's a Bosmer which isn't something I thought I'd ever be attracted to, but hey you live and learn. Her dress might hide most things, but I can see the two important ones!

Dear Diary,

A dragon flew over the city! A freaking real live dragon! Some soldiers went running through the city and a little later I heard an almighty commotion over near that old tower a few minutes out of town. That guy who went with the soldiers came back after that and from what I could tell, went straight to Dragonsreach. He must be important - so why did he steal that book from the shop the other day?

Dear Diary,

Made another trip to see Nimriel today... So pretty... I think I'm in love - maybe she'd feel the same if her boyfriend died... Wish he'd get killed: there are plenty of bandits and even some sort of civil war going on, so plenty of people who could kill him.

Dear Diary,

Son of a bitch! I was walking from the market to the shop and heard someone tell my joke! Like it was their own! He had a sword, so it's not like I could have said anything... There was obviously nothing wrong with his knee and he didn't even say it right.

Dear Diary,

Pretty sure I saw a werewolf... Hiding under my bed until I sober up, Diary...

Dear Diary,

I heard my joke again! From three people! This is so annoying - you make up a really funny joke and the guardsmen start saying it like it's a fact. I was gonna rock them with a great Knock Knock joke today, but not so sure I will now...

Dear Diary,

Rumour is that the Imperial army is gonna move on the city... Going to ask Nimriel to leave with me, go somewhere where there's no wars or dragons... Wish me luck, Diary!

Dear Diary,

I came to Skyrim to get away from violence and heartache - but they followed me to Skyrim... Nimriel said no and I have to accept that decision... Because they don't have roofies in Skyrim... So before the inevitable loss of the city to an invading army or dragon fire, I'm getting out of here. Think I'll go to the Capital Wasteland for a little quiet and nobody taking my jokes.

If you like these, take a look at Life as an NPC on reddit!